The silly bidding season

Something about this time of year makes normally sane people silly. Normally this comes out in faster driving, faster shopping and faster drinking but when playing bridge and not even the later is possible the bidding seems to get it.

Here's the first disaster:

Vul: EW Dealer: North	♠ K J 7 6 3 ♥ K 9 2 ♦ T 7 ♣ K 6 3
♠ - ♥ A Q 6 3 ♦ J 5 ♣ J T 9 8 5 4 2		♠ A 8 2 ♥ J T 7 4 ♦ A 9 8 4 2 ♣ A
	♠ Q T 9 5 4 ♥ 8 5 ♦ K Q 6 3 ♣ Q 7

North started with 2♠ showing 9-12 highs and 5 or 6 spades. 3♦ from East is, well, 'aggressive'. I was going to bid 3♠ on the south cards but I thought 4♠ might just look like a sacrifice if I bid it quickly and confidently. West agreed and made the optimistic 5♦ call at which I expressed my uncertainty about a few of those 11 tricks.
Neither the defense nor the dummy play was especially noteworthy, although there's 10 tricks in hearts only 8 are available in diamonds.




Ok at least everybody had good intentions and bid suits they had. I heard a tale of stranger goings on elsewhere in the room. Imagine you're playing against a couple of young guns, lets call them John Wignall and Kris Wooles. You're West (NS are vul) with this lovely collection and find yourself staring at two passes.

♠ 7 4 ♥ - ♦ K J T 9 5 4 ♣ A Q J 8 6

Great, 2NT you write clearly on the bidding pad. Seems like partner is asleep and has forgotten to alert; that explains a few things... No matter. The next hand bids 2♣ which is alerted and described as Landy. Strange. Oops! You've opened 1NT. Your partner passes, South bids 3♥ and desperate to catch up you double. That ends the auction and fidgeting wildly you lead the J♦ into this:

Vul: NS Dealer: East	♠ A J 5 2 ♥ J T 8 3 ♦ A 8 6 2 ♣ K
♠ 7 4 ♥ - ♦ K J T 9 5 4 ♣ A Q J 8 6		♠ Q 9 8 3 ♥ A Q 9 5 ♦ 3 ♣ 5 4 3 2
	♠ K T 6 ♥ K 7 6 4 2 ♦ Q 7 ♣ T 9 7

How would you play it given the available information?

John ran the diamond round to hand, exited a club toward the king and when the covered K♦ was ruffed exclaimed. As he put it, East has at most 2 hearts and now with only 1 diamond has 10 black cards yet can't squeak over 2♣! The resulting scramble left NS with 9 tricks and a very healthy number of IMPs.